Thursday, March 21, 2013

We're Down, But Not Out

Our match failed, the father wants to parent. Now what?  So far, we've run the gamut of emotions. We took the day off, slept 'til noon and wallowed in self-pity.  Then we got up, dusted ourselves off and started over.  What else can you do?

We learned a lot from this experience, so it wasn't for nothing.  Thanks J, for speaking up and putting us in touch with this girl. I know you feel terrible about it not working out, but don't. Our hearts are broken, but it wasn't meant to be. Please continue to help people and have hope for good things.

We'll do things differently next time.  We won't announce it again.  We'll ask more questions and not worry so much about whether we are upsetting the birth family.  We will try not get so attached and protect our hearts a little better.

We know that all of you are excited for us and sad for us at the same time. We appreciate your love and support.  Marlon and I are disappointed, but resilient, so don't worry about us too much.  When you get knocked down, you have to get back up again. It's the only choice you can make.  Better days will come, they always do.


If you know of anyone that wants to make an adoption plan for their newborn, please do not hestitate to contact us or share our profile information.  If you'd like more information about what are our adoption preferences, please email me. Thank you for thinking of us.

10 comments:

  1. Thinking of you both - good things happen to good people and I hope that your prayers will be answered. We love you!
    Kathy

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  2. We had a failed match as well. Mom decided to parent. Then, we were scammed. That was fun. For us, the third time was really the charm.

    Good luck on your adoption journey!

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    1. Thank you. I have good days where I just want to get back in it and other days where I feel so sad that my heart is almost too heavy to carry. I keep pushing through knowing that one day we will be parents.

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  3. Oh, I'm so sorry to hear this. I jumped over from the Bethany board, excited to see good news.
    We've been through a couple failed matches and it's heartbreaking. But you just take it one day at a time and eventually, you'll be parents.
    Much luck to you.

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    1. Thank you so much for your kind words and encouragement. We are feeling much better and ready to continue our adoption journey. We know our baby is out there waiting for us.

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  4. I just saw this from the Bethany board and wanted to encourage you too. The adoption journey can be such a hard one, but God does not waste any of these difficulties along the way. Hoping with you for a quick and amazingly happy ending to this part of your journey.

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    1. Thank you so much for your kind words and encouragement. I needed to hear that. :)

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    2. Thank you so much for sharing your story so openly. It is healing to read what others have experienced. We just had a failed placement through Bethany on Thursday and I am raw with emotion but searching for comfort In the words and experiences of others. So thank you for your honesty. if you want to connect check out my blog www.carriedbylove.com Right now I am lifting you up and carrying you in Love sweet "Bethany Blogging Friend"... Hoping we hold our babies In our arms soon...

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    3. I love that we're "Bethany Blogging Friends"! I know you are devastasted and it's so hard. I promise it does get better. Keep hope that our babies are out there. Sending you a big hug!

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