A recent headlining report by Dan Rather called Adopted or Abducted reveals findings after an 18-month-long investigation in which illegal and unethical tactics were used to convince young mothers to place their babies in adoptive homes from the late 1940s to the 1980s. I thought I would take a moment to share my thoughts.
Children taken away from their parents and being placed for adoption because someone else thought it best horrifies me. However, I am not surprised by the practice. Single parenting and adoption views were very different back then, but that still doesn't make it right. It breaks my heart to see all the comments from the article of mothers still grieving over the loss of their children so many years later.
Adoption is a complicated relationship. I never want our one day birth parents to feel forced to place their child with us. I don't want them to regret their decision or cause them a lifetime of pain. Or for our child to think that they were stolen and don't really belong with us. I couldn't bear the burden.
A lot has changed and this is why semi-open or open adoptions are steadily becoming the normal. I doubt all coercing has ceased, but as a whole, expectant parents have more information and counseling available than ever to help them make an informed decision of whether to parent or choose adoption. Society has relaxed their views of what a family should look like and have become more accepting of all situations. So there should never be a reason for someone to be forced or shamed into placing their child for adoption. I urge any expectant parent in a difficult situation to take in as much information as you can and choose what is best for you and your child. One of my favorite quotes is "It is better to make a decision, than for indecision to make you." ~Unknown
Adoption is a complicated relationship. I never want our one day birth parents to feel forced to place their child with us. I don't want them to regret their decision or cause them a lifetime of pain. Or for our child to think that they were stolen and don't really belong with us. I couldn't bear the burden.
A lot has changed and this is why semi-open or open adoptions are steadily becoming the normal. I doubt all coercing has ceased, but as a whole, expectant parents have more information and counseling available than ever to help them make an informed decision of whether to parent or choose adoption. Society has relaxed their views of what a family should look like and have become more accepting of all situations. So there should never be a reason for someone to be forced or shamed into placing their child for adoption. I urge any expectant parent in a difficult situation to take in as much information as you can and choose what is best for you and your child. One of my favorite quotes is "It is better to make a decision, than for indecision to make you." ~Unknown
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