Adoption, Not Abduction

A recent headlining report by Dan Rather called Adopted or Abducted reveals findings after an 18-month-long investigation in which illegal and unethical tactics were used to convince young mothers to place their babies in adoptive homes from the late 1940s to the 1980s.  I thought I would take a moment to share my thoughts.

Children taken away from their parents and being placed for adoption because someone else thought it best horrifies me.  However, I am not surprised by the practice.  Single parenting and adoption views were very different back then, but that still doesn't make it right.  It breaks my heart to see all the comments from the article of mothers still grieving over the loss of their children so many years later.

Adoption is a complicated relationship. I never want our one day birth parents to feel forced to place their child with us.  I don't want them to regret their decision or cause them a lifetime of pain.  Or for our child to think that they were stolen and don't really belong with us. I couldn't bear the burden.

A lot has changed and this is why semi-open or open adoptions are steadily becoming the normal. I doubt all coercing has ceased, but as a whole, expectant parents have more information and counseling available than ever to help them make an informed decision of whether to parent or choose adoption. Society has relaxed their views of what a family should look like and have become more accepting of all situations.  So there should never be a reason for someone to be forced or shamed into placing their child for adoption. I urge any expectant parent in a difficult situation to take in as much information as you can and choose what is best for you and your child.  One of my favorite quotes is "It is better to make a decision, than for indecision to make you." ~Unknown

♦ Get your puzzle piece here and help us adopt!  For a gift of $5, we'll add your name to the puzzle.  Thank you!



Hudson Valley is Fabulous

We have just returned from a romantic anniversary weekend in Hudson Valley, NY.  We thought long and hard about where we should go for our anniversary trip this year. It had to be affordable and we had to be able to get there quick because we cut our trip from a week to four days. Gotta save that vacation time in case a little one shows up in our lives.  When Marlon first suggested Hudson Valley, I have to admit I crinkled my nose and wasn't convinced.  He finally sold me on it and let me pick a B+B based solely on that they had Scottish Highland cows on the property.  You have to love this man.

Uly and Nessie

Brookfield Farm B+B was wonderful.  It is located in the middle of all the places we wanted to go.  It was the perfect place to slow down for a few days and to watch the birds and chipmunks out the window.  The room was decorated beautifully, but simple. It had a clean, sophisticated country look.  Each morning a picnic breakfast was delivered to our door filled with fresh fruit, baked goods and coffee.  Caroline and Michael were the perfect hosts.  They introduced us to the cows and chickens and gave us some great area recommendations.  I would definitely recommend this place to couples looking for a getaway.

Brookfield Farm

We had quite a few things that we wanted to see.  It's unimaginable that I could just sit for four days.  Of course, we hit Woodbury Common Outlets. It's on the way.  Marlon made a reservation at Le Canard Enchaine for our special anniversary dinner.  It was absolutely delicious and romantic.


We toured Brotherhood Winery, the oldest winery in America.  We had a few tastes while we were there too and stocked up on mead, port and wine.

Driving down historic Huguenot Street and looking at the old stone houses was so interesting.  While we were in New Paltz, we had to stop at October Country comic shop. Marlon found a deal on some old Doctor Who comics. That made his day. 

We took a stroll over the Walkway Over the Hudson.  The walkway was an abandoned railroad bridge that was turned into a pedestrian park.  The walkway is 1.28 miles long, it is the longest, elevated pedestrian bridge in the world.  The weather was perfect for a walk.

We visited the Dia: Beacon museum and checked out the exhibits there.  Some of the art was a little too conceptional for me, but there was an amazing work by Michael Heizer. These sculptures use negative space of steel geometric shapes embedded in the floor of the museum. It was really cool, but made my hands sweat and I held on to Marlon for dear life thinking I would fall into the sculpture.


We had to go to Stewarts. Why, oh why, do we not have Stewarts in Manhattan?  The birthday cake ice cream is the best!  They had 50¢ ice cream on St. Patty's Day.  It took all my self control not to order two.

My favorite part of the weekend was driving by this house on our anniversary and they had a sign out front that said "Happy Anniversary". We turned around and pulled in the drive-way (full of chickens) and jumped out and took our picture in front of the sign using the timer on the camera as fast as we could.  We drove by the next day and the sign had changed to "Happy Birthday to so and so".  I love that we stopped; it was one of those once in a life time moments that you just have to grab.

Hudson Valley was a great little vacation for us. You would never know NYC was just 1 1/2 hours away.  This might be our last anniversary trip as a couple.  After 18 years together, I think we can handle a family vacation next year. Fingers crossed!

♦ Puzzle pieces are still available.  For a gift of $5, we'll add your name to the puzzle.  Get yours here and help us adopt!  Thank you!

Eighteen Years of Wedded Bliss: The Story of How We Met

Today is my 18th Wedding Anniversary to the one I could not breathe without.  We are off celebrating in some romantic way as we've done every year since we have been married.

I thought you would enjoy the story on how we met.  We met 21 years ago at the Trilogy comic shop when I was 17 and he was 19.  I had just gotten my driver's license and any excuse for me to drive was good enough. So my friend Angi's little brothers wanted to go to the comic book store and we all hopped in the car headed to Trilogy.  They were looking around and I was looking at the clerk.  He had on a black t-shirt, jeans and barefoot.  He had that INXS Michael Hutchence thing going on.  We chatted a little bit, the kids bought their books and back into the car we went. Still in the parking lot, I told Angi, "that's the man I am going to marry".  She said, "well do you want me to run in and give him your phone number?"  She knew him a little from Rocky Horror.  Of course, I did.  And the rest is history. We went on our first date March 16, 1991 and were married three years later on March 16, 1994.  Happily Ever After.

Happy Anniversary to the love of my life.  The one that keeps me laughing everyday.  I love you.